kyleabaker.com

This video cracks me up, enjoy.

Facebook Gangsta from Facebook Gangsta on Vimeo.

Facebook Gangsta Lyrics:

Work from 9 to 5 on a typical day
From 5 to 9 is when I start to play
Without hesitation, head to my station
Pull up my homepage, give into temptation
Crap loada invitations

BLAM

There’s a poop loada notifications
I got females across 50 states
Who I monitor frequently by their status updates

Rachel was R-O-T-F-L today-day
Ally loves when Oprah uses the word “Vajayjay”
Lindsay is like so hung-over, OBVI
Terry is going to the party with Scotty
Whooo da Fuck is Scotty?
Bree got all the b-day messages, thanks a million
Krissy ready to party after her Brazilian
Where the Fuck is Krissy

[CHORUS]
Oooooooohhhh! a real gang-sta
You betta play by his rules
Oooooooohhhh! a real gang-sta
Or go back to MySpace, fools
The Facebook Gansta

Since we went all night all night
I bounce to satisfy my appetite
“Can I get a Ham on Rye, B?” – FBG
“Just requested you as a friend, why’d you deny me?” – Deli Man
“Yo, why you keep Frontin’ homie?” – FBG
“I know, I know, girls only.” – Deli Man
“Yo, why you keep cramping my gangsta style?” – FBG
“Can you at least give me access to your limited profile?” – Deli Man

Apparently, I picked the right direction
Spot a bitty with a natural tan complexion
There it is, that familiar look
Girl: “Um, do I know you?”
Recognize me from Facebook?
Girl: “Oh my God. It’s you! What ya doing later?”
Now I had to play it cool, if I was gon-na date her
Baby, it’s pretty much guaranteed
That I’m featured all over your daily newsfeed

Girl: “So, is there is something you can suggest…?”
Don’t trip. When you get home, expect a friend request
Then if you for real – if you ain’t phony
I’ll add you to my next event list – invite only
Girl: “OMG! You rock! Can I take some quick photos?”
Gotta act quick, best gangsta pose.
It’s reality, dawg
Someone could tag me in those.
Touch me

Time for my new motivator
Quick search and then I locate her
You wonder how I already lurk
Simple Son – We share the same net-work
I wonder if she may be a nympho
I go straight to her personal info
Why don’t you give her some real graffiti?

DRUMS

She loves day drinking and a dance party
Drinking diet cola - on the rocks - with Bacardi
She loves group seshies
Hanging with her besties
She loves shopping
Ryan Gosling?
Oh wait, it gets twice as shitty
Two more quotes from Sex and the City
She loves flirting, traveling, and laughing
Yes, I’m rapping factually – her fav-rite movies
Mean Girls, The Notebook, and Love Actually
She likes cold rainy days and warm summer nights
And being really warm on really cold nights – What!?!

[CHORUS]

Baby girl, I dig your flavor
Overall, you got good Facebook Behavior
But baby, let me plead my case – to please erase
Every picture of ya with the fu-cking “kissy face”
SPOKEN: “But you will get a piece of the Facebook Gangsta”
Our persona’s burning up like a sauna
YELLED: “Yo, hold up. Stop the beat a minute!”
I just confirmed friendship with O-bama – Ah, Yeah!

[CHORUS]